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Darqcyde
Joined: 10 Jul 2006
Posts: 11919
Location: A false vacuum abiding in ignorance.
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 Posted: Sun Nov 18, 2012 8:30 am Post subject: |
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| Miss Magenta wrote: | Dude it's a deconstruction of the concept of the friendzone.
You know, when Nice Guys™ gripe about how they've been friendzoned and whatever else it is they do when they want to fuck a girl who sees them as just a friend????
It's not even the first time it showed up and you only mention it NOW...??? Are you kitten me, man. 0_0 |
Actually, it's not the guys' nor the ladies' faults, it's the media. We are bombarded with overly romanticized stories where the main characters get the people they are in love with to ALWAYS fall in love with them. And they person that falls in love with them is always attractive and just perfect and makes them complete *barf*.
Girls or guys can be "in the friend zone", but it's really some place they've put themselves. HOWEVER if a guy or girl knows that a person is attracted to them, and they have not made it clear that feelings are not returned, then they (through their inaction and lack of communication) now share responsibility in creating this metaphoric prison. People need to buck up and realize that they will never be more than friends with said person, so they should turn their romantic interest elsewhere. Nothing is more sad nor pitiful than unrequited love.
The problem is though that often times there is never love to begin with, merely infatuation, but many people, usually the young, can't tell the difference. In these cases, I don't think it's healthy for either party, in the long run, to remain friends. Maybe after some time apart, sure, but emotions need to be sorted out and what not.
Also, as I recall it, the whole term friendzone wasn't just about sex. It seems to have been co-opted along the way to mean "will never have sex with". Where that came from was deluded young men (you can switch male and female, it works either way) who had female friends that would date douchebag after douchebag, meanwhile waiting in the wings thinking "After this asshole dumps her, she'll come to me and realize I'm a 'nice guy'" and then be my girlfriend." (whole knight in shining armor thing, again, point a finger at the media) What the young man doesn't realize is that said girl doesn't need a knight in shining armor, she needs to just grow up and stop dating douchebags; the answer to the problem, and the problem itself, do not involve the 'friend zoned guy' at all. As I see it, it's immaturity on both side.
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Darqcyde
Joined: 10 Jul 2006
Posts: 11919
Location: A false vacuum abiding in ignorance.
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| Posted: Sun Nov 18, 2012 8:38 am Post subject: |
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| Dogen wrote: | | MerchManDan wrote: | | Anyhow, I believe it was Snorri who wisely pointed out that the Friend Zone is something one does to oneself. It exists, but inside the minds of those who have been rejected. This is why there's no point in being just-friends with somebody if you're romantically interested but they aren't; it's nothing but pain. Let them go. |
This doesn't strike me as a positive approach, either. Emotionally safer, sure, but awfully simplistic. What about people on whom you have a crush? Or people you work with? Or, god forbid, the wife of a friend? There are going to be people in life you feel strongly about, and avoiding them isn't an answer. It buys into a notion that you're powerless to control your emotions, which I think has the potential to do more harm than good. I think - and this is purely an opinion - that we need to expect more from ourselves and others. If someone wants to be your friend that's good. There are precious few people I give a goddamn about to any significant depth. I'd rather have them as friends than not at all. Figuring out how not to get fucked up about it is just another life lesson. |
How about writing a bitchin' song as catharsis?
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Gibson22
Joined: 01 Jul 2012
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Darqcyde
Joined: 10 Jul 2006
Posts: 11919
Location: A false vacuum abiding in ignorance.
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| Posted: Sun Nov 18, 2012 11:24 am Post subject: |
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Actually, that's not that far off. Comical and exaggerated, but sadly on point from a third party perspective
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Dogen
Joined: 10 Jul 2006
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Location: PDX
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| Posted: Sun Nov 18, 2012 12:24 pm Post subject: |
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| Ronald wrote: | | Dogen wrote: | | There are precious few people I give a goddamn about to any significant depth. |
I'd never have guessed. |
I'm assuming this was said for your own amusement, because, well, see above. I'm glad that out of a relatively long post about whether it's better to reject those who stir your emotions for no other reason than the stirring itself, that you managed to find the one worthwhile thing to reply to... Which is that I don't give a fuck about you, and is it any wonder why? 
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LarsenSan
Joined: 10 May 2012
Posts: 63
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| Posted: Sun Nov 18, 2012 12:28 pm Post subject: |
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| Wait wait wait, the Sisterhood is the source of the friendzone? Now I hate them with all my soul. |
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Miss Magenta
Joined: 09 Jun 2011
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Location: Resigned From Position
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| Posted: Sun Nov 18, 2012 12:36 pm Post subject: |
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No they're the source for the Friend Zone which is kind of like the friendzone but it's a fucking park with a playground and everything how the fuck can you hate that
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Heretical Rants
Joined: 20 Jul 2009
Posts: 5344
Location: No.
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| Posted: Sun Nov 18, 2012 2:32 pm Post subject: |
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| LarsenSan wrote: | | Wait wait wait, the Sisterhood is the source of the friendzone? Now I hate them with all my soul. |
GTFO.
| Miss Magenta wrote: | | No they're the source for the Friend Zone which is kind of like the friendzone but it's a fucking park with a playground and everything how the fuck can you hate that |
DO THE FRIENDSHIP DANCE!
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Last edited by Heretical Rants on Sun Nov 18, 2012 2:37 pm; edited 1 time in total |
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Dogen
Joined: 10 Jul 2006
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| Posted: Sun Nov 18, 2012 2:35 pm Post subject: |
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| LarsenSan wrote: | | Wait wait wait, the Sisterhood is the source of the friendzone? Now I hate them with all my soul. |
You hate them for the park where friendly people go, or for the mythological place men get put when they don't get the attention they think they deserve from women? Because one is dumb and the other... Wait, that's just dumb.
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Heretical Rants
Joined: 20 Jul 2009
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| Posted: Sun Nov 18, 2012 3:56 pm Post subject: |
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He must not know the dance.
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Dogen
Joined: 10 Jul 2006
Posts: 11274
Location: PDX
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| Posted: Sun Nov 18, 2012 3:59 pm Post subject: |
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| Heretical Rants wrote: | | He must not know the dance. |
Shh! You'll ruin it for us!
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Oneponytoruleall
Joined: 02 Jan 2011
Posts: 3114
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| Posted: Sun Nov 18, 2012 4:18 pm Post subject: |
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| MerchManDan wrote: | | True enough. Same goes for sending a mass email, a few texts or just frikkin' calling the Sisters on the phone; that little dramatic touch adds so much. |
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Heretical Rants
Joined: 20 Jul 2009
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| Posted: Sun Nov 18, 2012 4:31 pm Post subject: |
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meanwhile the female Nice Guy (tm) is wondering why Joe hasn't asked her out yet
OH LOOK HEY EVERYONE CAN WHINE ABOUT THE FRIEND ZONE IF THEY'RE PATHETIC ENOUGH
IT'S NOT JUST YOU, SHY MANIPULATIVE GUY #33432533! YOU'RE NOT ALONE!
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MerchManDan
Joined: 20 Nov 2007
Posts: 2126
Location: Somewhere else.
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| Posted: Sun Nov 18, 2012 6:39 pm Post subject: |
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Manipulative. Oh good. This just gets fuckin' better and BETTER.
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| mouse wrote: | almost a shame to waste dennis' talent on him.
except it's always a pleasure to see a good dennis insult. |
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Dogen
Joined: 10 Jul 2006
Posts: 11274
Location: PDX
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| Posted: Sun Nov 18, 2012 6:53 pm Post subject: |
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What's your dysfunction?
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"Worse comes to worst, my people come first, but my tribe lives on every country on earth. I’ll do anything to protect them from hurt, the human race is what I serve." - Baba Brinkman |
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