A Respectful Conversation about Rape Culture

TIAB · Joined: 09 Jul 2006 Posts: 719

What bugs me about victim blaming is how narrow-sighted it is. Yes, I'm side-stepping the issue of the morality of it and focusing on the practicality of it. If we focus on what the victim could have done differently, at best they could have prevented the crime from happening to them, not someone else. It ignores the actual problem, that someone is out there creating victims. It ignores the cause.

Thenadathor · Joined: 17 Jul 2012 Posts: 66

Yinello · Joined: 09 May 2012 Posts: 3463

I think it's best if people stopped saying what the victim should do and ask what they can do to help. If someone gets attacked in an alleyway, is it best to set up cameras? If a group of boys are harassing women for wearing short skirts, should we host seminars to educate people? If a taxi driver assaults someone, how fast will the company take action?

Turn the ordeal around. Instead of asking what the victim did, ask yourself and everyone else what we failed to do.

There's nothing the victim can do to truly stop offenders from hurting more people because they are only one person. Telling victims on how to wear their clothes, where to go, what to do doesn't change society and its offenders at all. History has proven over and over that changing a victim's actions, looks or otherwise will not stop offenders. It's why I'm convinced that anything that puts weight on victims is instantly redundant and considered victim blaming (which is bad).

Society needs to wake up and collectively work together to punish offenders, not just brush it off on one person.

stripeypants · Posted: Thu Apr 04, 2013 5:34 am Post subject:

Thenadathor · Joined: 17 Jul 2012 Posts: 66

stripeypants · Posted: Fri Apr 05, 2013 9:32 pm Post subject:

Black Kitty · Joined: 10 Jul 2006 Posts: 744 Location: Under your bed.

Here's a topic I'd like to offer for discussion - the idea that our culture breeds an attitude of dominion over other people's bodies.

There's a tradition of publicly scrutinizing models and celebrities for their appearance. People watch shows and movies and comment, "Oh god, her teeth are fugly," or "Jesus, he needs a shave." There are tv shows and magazines whose sole purpose is to talk about other people's "baby bumps," pregnancy weight, and beach looks.

This solidifies this idea that you have a right to treat someone a certain way because of their appearance. That you have a right to judge and comment upon someone's weight, clothes, makeup, musculature, regardless of their feelings. That other people's appearance justifies your actions, and that their feelings don't matter, because after all, they're just some anonymous person that you'll never meet. But this mentality can seep into all of our interactions. I see it daily, when I walk through the city and get passing comments on my appearance, or am honked at on the street.

Here's the example that got me thinking about this. Even though the public's comments seem to be supportive of his look, they still indicate that the viewer has some right to comment upon what he should/shouldn't be doing with his body.

http://www.buzzfeed.com/mjs538/this-is-what-that-hot-calvin-klein-model-from-the-early-2000

Yes, freedom of speech and all, but it's just obnoxious that anyone would choose to exercise that freedom in such a frivolous and negative pursuit. It harms everyone, and contributes negatively to society in so many ways.

TIAB · Joined: 09 Jul 2006 Posts: 719

I think a large part of the issue is a result of our emphasis on individuality. There are countless cases in western culture, not just American, where individuals going "against the grain" and standing out are idolized. We villify conformity. The emphasis on individuality isn't inherently bad, but it it pushes people towards a very egocentric view of the world. We are always thinking in terms relative to how we are affected. When individuality is the highest priority, it can make it difficult to even think about other people as people as opposed to aspects of ourselves. We seek to satisfy our own individual desires and when something prevents or inhibits our ability to do so we feel threatened. Other people can be seen as obstacles at worst or at the very least competition.

Darqcyde · Posted: Thu Apr 11, 2013 10:29 am Post subject:

stripeypants · Posted: Thu Apr 11, 2013 10:50 am Post subject:

If you have giant boobs, they stand out no matter what you do, and people stare whether you've got them covered up.
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Arkhron · Joined: 18 Feb 2013 Posts: 272

A bit off from the actual topic of the threat, sorry, but: have you seen this movie? https://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/the_invisible_war/ ?

Is a representative depiction of the rape culture in the military? Should I see it?
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