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Sexual Orientation, Gender Identity, and the rest
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mouse



Joined: 10 Jul 2006
Posts: 17267
Location: under the bed

PostPosted: Fri May 16, 2014 7:38 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

i bought the yarn years ago, from this odd store that sold factory ends and the like. so i'm not sure of the contents - feels a bit like wool, but i wouldn't be surprised if it was acrylic. it's dark green - very merry-men-in-sherwood-foresty. i was planning to do something with a bit of lace - there's an old shetland lace pattern, just a few eyelets that give you a pretty solid but vertically striped fabric.

and a hood, of course - gotta have a hood. my ideas have evolved with all the shawl work i have done in the last few years, i'm figuring i will start with the hood, then connect that to a sort of faroese shoulder, then just keep knitting until i run out of yarn. or i guess get something so long i trip over it - i seem to have bought a lot of yarn.
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Thy Brilliance



Joined: 09 Jul 2006
Posts: 3572
Location: Relative

PostPosted: Fri May 16, 2014 7:55 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Darqcyde wrote:
I started to respond to him, then took a sip of coffee, and was all "WTF am I doing?!?!?"


You should remember that every moment you spend talking about me behind my back is a moment you aren't spending with your kids darc.
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Felgraf



Joined: 10 Jul 2012
Posts: 730

PostPosted: Fri May 16, 2014 8:10 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Thy Brilliance wrote:
Darqcyde wrote:
I started to respond to him, then took a sip of coffee, and was all "WTF am I doing?!?!?"


You should remember that every moment you spend talking about me behind my back is a moment you aren't spending with your kids darc.


Because, as we all know, his children are available 24/7and all parents should be fused to their children in some kind of grotesque abomination of the flesh.

Also seriously, dude. You are beyond petty.
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Thy Brilliance



Joined: 09 Jul 2006
Posts: 3572
Location: Relative

PostPosted: Fri May 16, 2014 8:18 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Felgraf wrote:
Thy Brilliance wrote:
Darqcyde wrote:
I started to respond to him, then took a sip of coffee, and was all "WTF am I doing?!?!?"


You should remember that every moment you spend talking about me behind my back is a moment you aren't spending with your kids darc.


Because, as we all know, his children are available 24/7and all parents should be fused to their children in some kind of grotesque abomination of the flesh.

Also seriously, dude. You are beyond petty.


Oh wait, I'm sorry, is that your passive aggressive apology for a lack of a serious response to the discussion of offensiveness?


If so, then I accept your apology.


It's good that we had this intellectual chat.
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Arc Tempest



Joined: 28 Jan 2007
Posts: 4903
Location: Oregon

PostPosted: Fri May 16, 2014 8:54 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Thy Brilliance wrote:
Darqcyde wrote:
I started to respond to him, then took a sip of coffee, and was all "WTF am I doing?!?!?"


You should remember that every moment you spend talking about me behind my back is a moment you aren't spending with your kids darc.


Wait, posting an open response in a forum constitutes talking behind someone's back now?
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Felgraf



Joined: 10 Jul 2012
Posts: 730

PostPosted: Sat May 17, 2014 12:26 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Thy Brilliance wrote:
Felgraf wrote:
Thy Brilliance wrote:
Darqcyde wrote:
I started to respond to him, then took a sip of coffee, and was all "WTF am I doing?!?!?"


You should remember that every moment you spend talking about me behind my back is a moment you aren't spending with your kids darc.


Because, as we all know, his children are available 24/7and all parents should be fused to their children in some kind of grotesque abomination of the flesh.

Also seriously, dude. You are beyond petty.


Oh wait, I'm sorry, is that your passive aggressive apology for a lack of a serious response to the discussion of offensiveness?


If so, then I accept your apology.


It's good that we had this intellectual chat.


... What?

How could my post be both the 'offense' and the apology for the offense at the same time?

And nah, that wasn't intended to be passive aggressive. Passive aggressive would be more disguised. That was more me outright mocking you and calling you out on the utter absurdity of your statement. YOUR statement was pretty damn passive aggressive (You're neglecting your kids! TSK TSK!), so perhaps you're just projecting. It does seem to be one of your skills.

I was, in fact, openly mocking your statement.

But apparently you don't do subtlety well, so:

Your statement was absurd both on it's face and in its use. 1) People have lives outside their children. 2) Attempting to imply that the five seconds it takes him to post here is somehow depriving his child of quality time is inane. 3) Dragging his children into it because you're pissed at him is *vile*.
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"No, but evil is still being --Is having reason-- Being reasonable! Mousie understands? Is always being reason. Is punishing world for not being... Like in head. Is always reason. World should be different, is reason."
-Ed, from Digger
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Finnegan



Joined: 01 May 2007
Posts: 1080
Location: in that cool mountain air, on an appalachian trail

PostPosted: Sat May 17, 2014 12:46 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Thanks for the explanations. yeah, the issues are much clearer now. again, I want thank everyone who replied for doing so in a calm, patient, clear and informative manner. I know some people question the reasoning behind articles like this just to stir up controversy, but it really means a lot to me that even though I often question or ask for clarification on some of these articles that I'm always answered respectfully and things are explained like you understand that I am only asking to so that I can understand the issues better and be a better informed and more sensitive person (especially as I am finding myself identifying less and less than with how I was raised but have no community to learn from). I don't know, maybe I have posted enough that it is clear that my questions are only my attempts to learn and better understand, but I'm still appreciative of how they are responded to, especially and most consistently by Samsally and stripeypants (I love you guys*); but also by Echo in this instance and by Sam in the feminism thread.

*guys being used as gender neutral and my love for how much both of you have helped me, because you've come to have played an important influence in my life, I've always enjoyed our exchanges, and because I'm genuinely fond of you both. and even though I took a bit of a hiatus from the forum due to life complications, illness, and trying to figure somethings out on my own; I liked to think that we were getting to be friends before I disappeared. (I still have those naked jesus on a pegasus animations in use in various places and still get a kick out of them every time I see them).
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Thy Brilliance



Joined: 09 Jul 2006
Posts: 3572
Location: Relative

PostPosted: Sat May 17, 2014 3:21 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Felgraf wrote:
Thy Brilliance wrote:
Felgraf wrote:
Thy Brilliance wrote:
Darqcyde wrote:
I started to respond to him, then took a sip of coffee, and was all "WTF am I doing?!?!?"


You should remember that every moment you spend talking about me behind my back is a moment you aren't spending with your kids darc.


Because, as we all know, his children are available 24/7and all parents should be fused to their children in some kind of grotesque abomination of the flesh.

Also seriously, dude. You are beyond petty.


Oh wait, I'm sorry, is that your passive aggressive apology for a lack of a serious response to the discussion of offensiveness?


If so, then I accept your apology.


It's good that we had this intellectual chat.


... What?

How could my post be both the 'offense' and the apology for the offense at the same time?

And nah, that wasn't intended to be passive aggressive. Passive aggressive would be more disguised. That was more me outright mocking you and calling you out on the utter absurdity of your statement. YOUR statement was pretty damn passive aggressive (You're neglecting your kids! TSK TSK!), so perhaps you're just projecting. It does seem to be one of your skills.

I was, in fact, openly mocking your statement.

But apparently you don't do subtlety well, so:

Your statement was absurd both on it's face and in its use. 1) People have lives outside their children. 2) Attempting to imply that the five seconds it takes him to post here is somehow depriving his child of quality time is inane. 3) Dragging his children into it because you're pissed at him is *vile*.




Read my statement again until you fully understand why darc is being an asshole, and why his time is better spent worrying about his kids than worrying about me.

This is not an absurd statement. I'm questioning the use of his time.

What is absurd is your inability to understand a very simple statement of fact.



Another fun fact:
The ability to doubt, the ability to question anything and everything is not in any way shape or form controversial.


If you do not treat my questions with respect, do not expect any respect in return.


Furthermore:
Friends that are able to criticize each other have achieved the healthiest type of relationship.

If you tell me that I cannot criticize you on any matter without revoking your friendship, I will consider that a major problem on your part.

Once again, glad we had this chat.
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Samsally



Joined: 10 Jul 2006
Posts: 6500

PostPosted: Sat May 17, 2014 3:52 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Finnegan wrote:
Thanks for the explanations. yeah, the issues are much clearer now. again, I want thank everyone who replied for doing so in a calm, patient, clear and informative manner. I know some people question the reasoning behind articles like this just to stir up controversy, but it really means a lot to me that even though I often question or ask for clarification on some of these articles that I'm always answered respectfully and things are explained like you understand that I am only asking to so that I can understand the issues better and be a better informed and more sensitive person (especially as I am finding myself identifying less and less than with how I was raised but have no community to learn from). I don't know, maybe I have posted enough that it is clear that my questions are only my attempts to learn and better understand, but I'm still appreciative of how they are responded to, especially and most consistently by Samsally and stripeypants (I love you guys*); but also by Echo in this instance and by Sam in the feminism thread.

*guys being used as gender neutral and my love for how much both of you have helped me, because you've come to have played an important influence in my life, I've always enjoyed our exchanges, and because I'm genuinely fond of you both. and even though I took a bit of a hiatus from the forum due to life complications, illness, and trying to figure somethings out on my own; I liked to think that we were getting to be friends before I disappeared. (I still have those naked jesus on a pegasus animations in use in various places and still get a kick out of them every time I see them).


<3 Questions asked in good faith are never a problem, I don't think. And I definitely consider you a friend, or at the very least getting there. I'm glad you're back.
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stripeypants



Joined: 24 Feb 2013
Posts: 3429
Location: Land of the Grumpuses

PostPosted: Sat May 17, 2014 5:51 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

mouse wrote:
i bought the yarn years ago, from this odd store that sold factory ends and the like. so i'm not sure of the contents - feels a bit like wool, but i wouldn't be surprised if it was acrylic. it's dark green - very merry-men-in-sherwood-foresty. i was planning to do something with a bit of lace - there's an old shetland lace pattern, just a few eyelets that give you a pretty solid but vertically striped fabric.

and a hood, of course - gotta have a hood. my ideas have evolved with all the shawl work i have done in the last few years, i'm figuring i will start with the hood, then connect that to a sort of faroese shoulder, then just keep knitting until i run out of yarn. or i guess get something so long i trip over it - i seem to have bought a lot of yarn.


We get factory ends sometimes in a great big box, which is the most delightful thing ever. Until I started getting those, I didn't realize how good a job acrylic yarn manufacturers actually do imitating wool.

That sounds like a gorgeous color!
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stripeypants



Joined: 24 Feb 2013
Posts: 3429
Location: Land of the Grumpuses

PostPosted: Sat May 17, 2014 6:03 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Samsally wrote:
Finnegan wrote:
Thanks for the explanations. yeah, the issues are much clearer now. again, I want thank everyone who replied for doing so in a calm, patient, clear and informative manner. I know some people question the reasoning behind articles like this just to stir up controversy, but it really means a lot to me that even though I often question or ask for clarification on some of these articles that I'm always answered respectfully and things are explained like you understand that I am only asking to so that I can understand the issues better and be a better informed and more sensitive person (especially as I am finding myself identifying less and less than with how I was raised but have no community to learn from). I don't know, maybe I have posted enough that it is clear that my questions are only my attempts to learn and better understand, but I'm still appreciative of how they are responded to, especially and most consistently by Samsally and stripeypants (I love you guys*); but also by Echo in this instance and by Sam in the feminism thread.

*guys being used as gender neutral and my love for how much both of you have helped me, because you've come to have played an important influence in my life, I've always enjoyed our exchanges, and because I'm genuinely fond of you both. and even though I took a bit of a hiatus from the forum due to life complications, illness, and trying to figure somethings out on my own; I liked to think that we were getting to be friends before I disappeared. (I still have those naked jesus on a pegasus animations in use in various places and still get a kick out of them every time I see them).


<3 Questions asked in good faith are never a problem, I don't think. And I definitely consider you a friend, or at the very least getting there. I'm glad you're back.


For sure. I like to explain when I understand something and can help make sense of it, as long as the other person is really honestly asking. I know what it feels like too to not know why everyone is up in arms, but not wanting to be offensive when I don't know any better.
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Echo



Joined: 18 Jul 2013
Posts: 645

PostPosted: Sat May 17, 2014 9:41 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Just to add my own comments - everyone else has already covered it really, but as I was mentioned by name I thought I ought to say something - yes, questions asked in good faith are always welcome. Otherwise it's difficult to learn from anyone else's perspective on a matter. And I always try to respond in a neutral but informative manner, because... well, if someone's taken the care to ask politely and in a non-prejudiced manner, it's worth being polite enough to answer in a similar manner.

And one of the things I like about this place is that, a few problematic users aside, we can generally get on with each other and learn things from each other's perspectives, rather than following the pattern of much of the rest of the internet and yelling at each other from entrenched positions while others look on and don't understand any of it.

So Yay for everyone. Except the contents of my ignore list. ;-D
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Moor



Joined: 07 May 2013
Posts: 318

PostPosted: Sun May 18, 2014 6:17 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

stripeypants wrote:
mouse wrote:
i bought the yarn years ago, from this odd store that sold factory ends and the like. so i'm not sure of the contents - feels a bit like wool, but i wouldn't be surprised if it was acrylic. it's dark green - very merry-men-in-sherwood-foresty. i was planning to do something with a bit of lace - there's an old shetland lace pattern, just a few eyelets that give you a pretty solid but vertically striped fabric.

and a hood, of course - gotta have a hood. my ideas have evolved with all the shawl work i have done in the last few years, i'm figuring i will start with the hood, then connect that to a sort of faroese shoulder, then just keep knitting until i run out of yarn. or i guess get something so long i trip over it - i seem to have bought a lot of yarn.


We get factory ends sometimes in a great big box, which is the most delightful thing ever. Until I started getting those, I didn't realize how good a job acrylic yarn manufacturers actually do imitating wool.

That sounds like a gorgeous color!


I'm pretty inexperienced in terms of yarn-stuff -- may I ask what factory ends are?
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stripeypants



Joined: 24 Feb 2013
Posts: 3429
Location: Land of the Grumpuses

PostPosted: Sun May 18, 2014 7:24 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Factory ends are the last runs (and I think also first runs) of fiber products. They tend to have knots and other imperfections, so companies that normally charge big prices can't charge them for these. So they offer them in bulk for cheap.

That's also why fabric is cheaper at Wal-mart and Jo-Ann fabrics than quilt stores. The quilt stores get the good stuff. Wal-mart and Jo-ann's get the cheap stuff. Some people do not give a crap about the difference - especially since nowadays fabric has become so expensive that making your own clothes isn't actually financially worth it most of the time.
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Samsally



Joined: 10 Jul 2006
Posts: 6500

PostPosted: Mon May 19, 2014 1:10 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Yeah it's so weird when people get like, judgy over the lack of home-made stuff I wear?

It's like "Excuse me I could spend $15 on a cute shirt that I know fits well and hangs right and have it immediately or I could spend $40 on fabric, spend 10-20 hours working on it, and still not know if it'll turn out shitty or not. Which option do you -think- I'm going to pick more often?"
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