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andrew
Joined: 13 Jul 2006
Posts: 4495
Location: the raging sea
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 Posted: Wed Mar 05, 2008 1:05 am Post subject: In the World of Science LIX2DIX: Airborne doesn't do shit |
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Whee!
| Quote: | One morning several summers ago, mortality drew me close. My nasal passages were inflamed, my mouth dry, my head heavy.
This cannot end well, I said to myself, and I visited the local apothecary in search of some salve. There, on the shelf, I beheld a small vial. It was decorated with images of sad souls like myself -- people pushed tightly against one another in airplanes and schools and offices, ugly, murderous germs passing freely between them. The vial promised salvation. Take this potion, it offered, and your ills will be remedied.
I did. And it worked! I did not get sick. And from then on, I was hooked. At the first hint of sickness, I would reach for this magical drink. They -- and by they, I mean Oprah, a fervent proselytizer -- called it Airborne, and everyone used it: A couple years ago, sales of the stuff reached $100 million a year.
But was I tricked? I did not get sick. But was it the Airborne that kept me healthy? Had I not taken it, would I have gotten better anyway? On further uses, I found the potion less effective. I'd drink some at the first rumor of illness. Half the time I'd get sick, half the time I wouldn't. So was Airborne working, or wasn't it?
It wasn't. In 2006, ABC News discovered that the "clinical study" that the company had been touting as proof that its product cured colds was not really very clinical, nor much of a study.
"There was no clinic, no scientists and no doctors," ABC reported. "The man who ran things said he had lots of clinical trial experience. He added that he had a degree from Indiana University, but the school says he never graduated."
That report sparked a class-action lawsuit. Now, while not admitting any wrongdoing, the company has agreed to settle the lawsuit, and it will offer Airborne customers a refund on sales, paying out $23 million. |
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Finnegan
Joined: 01 May 2007
Posts: 550
Location: in that cool mountain air, on an appalachian trail
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| Posted: Wed Mar 05, 2008 1:23 am Post subject: |
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| The ghost of Linus Pauling cannot be quelled so easily. |
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Set
Joined: 17 May 2007
Posts: 506
Location: On a bed on a shoreline
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| Posted: Thu Mar 06, 2008 10:56 pm Post subject: |
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i wanna make 100 million and only have to lose 23 million and keep the rest.
_________________
| Quote: | | And so, the truth is held in front of veiled eyes. All people need is someone to reveal it. |
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Thy Brilliance
Joined: 09 Jul 2006
Posts: 3090
Location: Relative
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| Posted: Fri Mar 07, 2008 1:01 am Post subject: I never get sick anyway. |
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| You have to admit, it tasted pretty damn good, better than coke even. |
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Sam
Joined: 09 Jul 2006
Posts: 8567
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| Posted: Fri Mar 07, 2008 2:31 am Post subject: |
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| I already signed up to get about $50 if this lawlsuit goes through. |
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nathan
Joined: 10 Jul 2006
Posts: 6269
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| Posted: Fri Mar 07, 2008 2:40 am Post subject: |
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I've been making fun of people for using this stuff for the longest time.
VICTORY IS MINE.
_________________
All our final decisions are made in a state of mind that is not going to last. - Marky Mark Proust |
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Finnegan
Joined: 01 May 2007
Posts: 550
Location: in that cool mountain air, on an appalachian trail
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| Posted: Sun Mar 09, 2008 3:43 am Post subject: |
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| Sam wrote: | | I already signed up to get about $50 if this lawlsuit goes through. |
are you just after a quick 50 bucks or did you really spend that much on this stuff? |
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Azmoten
Joined: 10 Jul 2006
Posts: 2199
Location: St. Louis
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| Posted: Sun Mar 09, 2008 3:51 am Post subject: |
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I'm wondering if Sam intentionally wrote "lawlsuit" or if it was just a zany accident.
_________________
"Give a man a fire and he's warm for a day, but set fire to him and he's warm for the rest of his life."
-Solid Jackson (From Jingo, by Terry Pratchett) |
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Finnegan
Joined: 01 May 2007
Posts: 550
Location: in that cool mountain air, on an appalachian trail
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| Posted: Sun Mar 09, 2008 4:05 am Post subject: |
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| oh, I'm sure it was intentional. |
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Sam
Joined: 09 Jul 2006
Posts: 8567
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| Posted: Sun Mar 09, 2008 10:16 pm Post subject: |
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| Finnegan wrote: | | Sam wrote: | | I already signed up to get about $50 if this lawlsuit goes through. |
are you just after a quick 50 bucks or did you really spend that much on this stuff? |
To answer your question, we are not going to comment on ongoing legal affairs until they have been resolved.
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