I may be losing my aunt in the next few days

[astrocitizen]

I'm sorry to interrupt our group's standard routine, but I may be losing my aunt -- my mother's elder sister -- within the next day or two. Health issues over the past two years have resulted in scar tissue and the like to her lungs; the past week the doctors have tried to keep her in what my mom simply calls the "robot bed" to rotate her in the hopes of change, but little has gained from it.



I saw her infrequently as a child, and a little bit more in recent years. Her family often had either health issues or financial woes, so they were unable to travel and see my family. As a result, we would have had to go to them, but hardly ever happened as, frankly, my father could have gone without most of them -- her husband was a know-nothing know-it-all invariably responsible for their financial situation, none of them used their "in door voices" as my parents politely put it, etc. Much of life has been hard on my aunt, which only began to pick up in the past few years when her husband died, his pension being enough to finally get them out of debt, and hopefully enjoy the remainder of her golden years.



I wish I'd been able to spend more time with her, and thought that I would now. Sadly, a refusal to misconstrued as a hypocondriac led her to a habit of struggling through any medical issue that might crop up for herself; this has resulted in severe respiratory problems and extended stays hospitalized these past two winters. But for the grace of God this will be her final bout, and not in a way that I would wish. This attitude may be selfish on my part, but the suggestion that she will soon be beyond pain is of meager comfort to my mother and I right now.



--JRP
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AstroCitizen -- soon to become "My Sacred Identity"

"I'm not one of those idiots who takes what he sees on TV or movies, and applies it in real life! These days, they're always the third or fourth guy to get killed..."

[Dogen]

I'm sorry. Losing a loved one is hard, especially when the circumstances seem so unfair. Your response isn't unusual, it reflects the attachment we feel for our families and the desire for them to be with us. Hopefully sharing the news with us and putting your thoughts in writing has brought you some small relief, even if it wasn't much. The rest takes time.

My best wishes for you and your mother.
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"Worse comes to worst, my people come first, but my tribe lives on every country on earth. I’ll do anything to protect them from hurt, the human race is what I serve." - Baba Brinkman

[Oneponytoruleall]

...

[Yorick]

useless to say, sucks dude.
losing any family member, close or not, isn't fun.
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Currently experiencing: not summer.

[Mindslicer]

That's awful. Sorry about what seems to be an impending loss for you and your family. Even if you two weren't close, losing a family member is never easy. If she cannot recover, I hope her passing happens gently and without suffering. Be strong in the days to come.

[mouse]

i'm sorry to hear this. it's sad that we let what, in the long run, are trivial things get in the way of our relationships with people. even sadder that, knowing this to be true, we still let it happen. it sounds like that's a lot of what you are feeling badly about - the difficulties of your aunt's life, and that you all weren't with her in part because of those difficulties (like her obnoxious husband).

i can only hope that her passing is a gentle one, and that you will be able to remember her fondly and without guilt.
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aka: neverscared!

[Oneponytoruleall]

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[Yorick]

sorry, Pony boy.
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Currently experiencing: not summer.

[BigBadWolf]

I know this doesnt help much but my condolences dude
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