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I may be losing my aunt in the next few days

 
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astrocitizen



Joined: 19 Aug 2008
Posts: 324

PostPosted: Thu Jan 20, 2011 4:11 am    Post subject: I may be losing my aunt in the next few days Reply with quote

I'm sorry to interrupt our group's standard routine, but I may be losing my aunt -- my mother's elder sister -- within the next day or two. Health issues over the past two years have resulted in scar tissue and the like to her lungs; the past week the doctors have tried to keep her in what my mom simply calls the "robot bed" to rotate her in the hopes of change, but little has gained from it.



I saw her infrequently as a child, and a little bit more in recent years. Her family often had either health issues or financial woes, so they were unable to travel and see my family. As a result, we would have had to go to them, but hardly ever happened as, frankly, my father could have gone without most of them -- her husband was a know-nothing know-it-all invariably responsible for their financial situation, none of them used their "in door voices" as my parents politely put it, etc. Much of life has been hard on my aunt, which only began to pick up in the past few years when her husband died, his pension being enough to finally get them out of debt, and hopefully enjoy the remainder of her golden years.



I wish I'd been able to spend more time with her, and thought that I would now. Sadly, a refusal to misconstrued as a hypocondriac led her to a habit of struggling through any medical issue that might crop up for herself; this has resulted in severe respiratory problems and extended stays hospitalized these past two winters. But for the grace of God this will be her final bout, and not in a way that I would wish. This attitude may be selfish on my part, but the suggestion that she will soon be beyond pain is of meager comfort to my mother and I right now.



--JRP
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Dogen



Joined: 10 Jul 2006
Posts: 10730
Location: Bellingham, WA

PostPosted: Thu Jan 20, 2011 4:29 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I'm sorry. Losing a loved one is hard, especially when the circumstances seem so unfair. Your response isn't unusual, it reflects the attachment we feel for our families and the desire for them to be with us. Hopefully sharing the news with us and putting your thoughts in writing has brought you some small relief, even if it wasn't much. The rest takes time.

My best wishes for you and your mother.
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Oneponytoruleall



Joined: 02 Jan 2011
Posts: 3114

PostPosted: Thu Jan 20, 2011 4:36 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

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Last edited by Oneponytoruleall on Tue Jun 07, 2011 3:55 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Yorick



Joined: 11 Jul 2006
Posts: 12101
Location: In the undersnow

PostPosted: Thu Jan 20, 2011 5:25 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

useless to say, sucks dude. Sad
losing any family member, close or not, isn't fun.
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Mindslicer



Joined: 04 Sep 2006
Posts: 1835
Location: North of the People's Republic of Massachusetts

PostPosted: Thu Jan 20, 2011 11:55 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

That's awful. Sorry about what seems to be an impending loss for you and your family. Even if you two weren't close, losing a family member is never easy. If she cannot recover, I hope her passing happens gently and without suffering. Be strong in the days to come.
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mouse



Joined: 10 Jul 2006
Posts: 17205
Location: under the bed

PostPosted: Thu Jan 20, 2011 8:03 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

i'm sorry to hear this. it's sad that we let what, in the long run, are trivial things get in the way of our relationships with people. even sadder that, knowing this to be true, we still let it happen. it sounds like that's a lot of what you are feeling badly about - the difficulties of your aunt's life, and that you all weren't with her in part because of those difficulties (like her obnoxious husband).

i can only hope that her passing is a gentle one, and that you will be able to remember her fondly and without guilt.
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Oneponytoruleall



Joined: 02 Jan 2011
Posts: 3114

PostPosted: Sun Jan 23, 2011 3:01 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

...

Last edited by Oneponytoruleall on Tue Jun 07, 2011 5:19 am; edited 1 time in total
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Yorick



Joined: 11 Jul 2006
Posts: 12101
Location: In the undersnow

PostPosted: Sun Jan 23, 2011 4:06 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

sorry, Pony boy.
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BigBadWolf



Joined: 21 Mar 2010
Posts: 1041
Location: Not Here

PostPosted: Sun Jan 23, 2011 5:51 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I know this doesnt help much but my condolences dude
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