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2/12/2014 - Harassholes
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Cactuar



Joined: 10 Oct 2011
Posts: 105

PostPosted: Wed Feb 12, 2014 4:09 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

NTM to add,

that there is really an element of threat in these situations.

When I was a teen I remember being out at my town festival with my friend and a group of guys started shouting at us. When we didn't answer they followed us down the street shouting more and worse. That isn't the only time I've been followed.

I've heard many similar stories from other women.

There's always at least a small aura of "refuse to play my game and you won't like the results" that make it even more galling when people try to tell you how "harmless" this stuff is.

Lastly, keep in mind how young this happens to people. I was just a kid when it started happening to me. I had no idea why these scary grown men were shouting at me or slowing down their cars to follow me and honk at me. I literally could not even realize what it had to do with. I just knew it was uncomfortable and sometimes frightening and made me feel bad every time.

And it's not like these men couldn't grasp that I was probably a minor. One of the most frequently asked questions, when questions were asked, was how old I was. At least most of them had the minimum decency to leave me the fuck alone when they got the answer.
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Samsally



Joined: 10 Jul 2006
Posts: 6399

PostPosted: Wed Feb 12, 2014 4:19 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Or did I mention that one time I was walking with a guy I was dating and someone got right up behind us and waxed drunkenly about how he wanted to fuck me in the ass as some sort of attempt to pick a fight with the guy I was with.

I'm sure I should feel better about it because it wasn't -really- about me though, right? Because it was all about picking a fight.

That should totally make it okay for him to talk about wanting to make me cry and describing how in such detail.

It wasn't even about me.
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Samsally the GrayAce
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Samsally



Joined: 10 Jul 2006
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PostPosted: Wed Feb 12, 2014 4:21 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Or that time a homeless man wouldn't let go of my hand and I had to yank it away and run into traffic to escape.
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Samsally



Joined: 10 Jul 2006
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PostPosted: Wed Feb 12, 2014 4:24 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Or the epic saga of the coffee shop guy who didn't even buy coffee; who hated 'fake' people but wouldn't stop telling me what I should be thinking or feeling at any given time. Listened in on my phone conversation with a guy I was dating, staring at me the whole time, then implied I should call him later. Denied 'flirting' because 'flirting is just something people do when they don't mean it'. Whatever the fuck 'it' is.
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Dogen



Joined: 10 Jul 2006
Posts: 10693
Location: Bellingham, WA

PostPosted: Wed Feb 12, 2014 4:29 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Graybeard wrote:
Fair enough. Estranged's point still stands.

In what way does his point still stand? It's wrong to harass people walking by, period. It's wrong to sexually harass people, period. There is no way that being oppressed - which, at least here, isn't even true of construction workers* - suddenly gives you the right to sexually harass someone. So, how does his point still stand?


* There are racial issues in construction work, but that's separate from construction workers in general being treated poorly.
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stripeypants



Joined: 24 Feb 2013
Posts: 3323
Location: Land of the Grumpuses

PostPosted: Wed Feb 12, 2014 4:35 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Or how about that time a construction worker stopped me in the street to be creepy and invasive and loudly proclaiming, "YOUR BOYFRIEND SHOULD NEVER HIT YOU" after trying to get me to meet up with him for sex somewhere.


Estranged has no point. Estranged has a confusing pile of bullshit.
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Ricia



Joined: 19 Feb 2013
Posts: 78

PostPosted: Wed Feb 12, 2014 5:34 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

*deleted due to pointlessness*

Last edited by Ricia on Thu Feb 13, 2014 3:33 am; edited 2 times in total
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Felgraf



Joined: 10 Jul 2012
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PostPosted: Wed Feb 12, 2014 6:01 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

EDIT: No longer necessary! Quote and worries about miscommunication resolved.
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Last edited by Felgraf on Wed Feb 12, 2014 6:43 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Dogen



Joined: 10 Jul 2006
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PostPosted: Wed Feb 12, 2014 6:03 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

You're both missing two closing tags. Zhuinden said the dumb thing about construction workers.
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Ricia



Joined: 19 Feb 2013
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PostPosted: Wed Feb 12, 2014 6:03 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

[quote="Felgraf"][quote="Ricia"]
Zhuinden wrote:
Graybeard wrote:
Felgraf wrote:

This could be attributed to the fact that a general construction worker is more muscle than brain, and is therefore apart from being raised in a sexist environment without the capability or need to question it, they don't have the self-control to refrain themselves from such vile behavior.


Ugh. No. This is just insulting to everybody who works in manual labor. Anybody can be a harasser, blue collar or white collar. I've heard just as many disgusting comments from guys in suits as I have from guys in work shirts and jeans.

FTR I work in food service and wait on construction workers all the time. 99.9% of them were polite and friendly. Hell one time when one of them went too far with his comments, the others called him out on it and he apologized.

The stereotype that everybody who works with their hands is stupid, pisses me off. It's prevalent in the school systems as well. I wanted to get into one of these fields, learn building, welding, auto mechanics or something of that nature. I'm good with power tools and enjoy the work. My school wouldn't let me into the program. Not because my sex is female, but because I was too smart. Yes, they actually said that to me. They said my grades were too high to do something I sincerely wanted to do.

Sorry for continuing the derailment of the real topic. I just had to get that off my chest.


Uh, I think it's just 'cause your quotes got screwed up, but I would like the record to show that I did not say that, and was responding to a statement making that. I agree that it's an insulting and *wrong* stereotype, and it makes me irritated, too. (and I don't *know* any construction workers!)


Oh oops, I wonder how that happened. I know you didn't say it. Let me see if I can fix it.

Edit: Fixed
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Dogen



Joined: 10 Jul 2006
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Location: Bellingham, WA

PostPosted: Wed Feb 12, 2014 6:07 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Ricia wrote:
Felgraf wrote:
Ricia wrote:
Zhuinden wrote:

This could be attributed to the fact that a general construction worker is more muscle than brain, and is therefore apart from being raised in a sexist environment without the capability or need to question it, they don't have the self-control to refrain themselves from such vile behavior.


Ugh. No. This is just insulting to everybody who works in manual labor. Anybody can be a harasser, blue collar or white collar. I've heard just as many disgusting comments from guys in suits as I have from guys in work shirts and jeans.

FTR I work in food service and wait on construction workers all the time. 99.9% of them were polite and friendly. Hell one time when one of them went too far with his comments, the others called him out on it and he apologized.

The stereotype that everybody who works with their hands is stupid, pisses me off. It's prevalent in the school systems as well. I wanted to get into one of these fields, learn building, welding, auto mechanics or something of that nature. I'm good with power tools and enjoy the work. My school wouldn't let me into the program. Not because my sex is female, but because I was too smart. Yes, they actually said that to me. They said my grades were too high to do something I sincerely wanted to do.

Sorry for continuing the derailment of the real topic. I just had to get that off my chest.


Uh, I think it's just 'cause your quotes got screwed up, but I would like the record to show that I did not say that, and was responding to a statement making that. I agree that it's an insulting and *wrong* stereotype, and it makes me irritated, too. (and I don't *know* any construction workers!)


Oh oops, I wonder how that happened. I know you didn't say it. Let me see if I can fix it.

Edit: Fixed

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enchantedsleeper



Joined: 16 Jun 2013
Posts: 202
Location: United Kingdom

PostPosted: Wed Feb 12, 2014 7:10 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

MerchManDan wrote:
(as they were back then, anyways; these days, it would probably bother Fyoosh just as much. Blue....well, that's a tougher call.)


I can see Blue either coldly ignoring the catcalls, or turning a gaze of steel on the devil-men and threatening to get them fired. Or maybe just bomfing them.

I'd be really interested to see how this situation might play out if it were Criminy and Fusch walking past instead of 'Nique and Abby.

Also, yaaaaay, a 'Nique/Abby strip! <3 I hope we might get to see a few of these in a row.
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Thy Brilliance



Joined: 09 Jul 2006
Posts: 3542
Location: Relative

PostPosted: Wed Feb 12, 2014 7:25 pm    Post subject: This being Sinfest Reply with quote

http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/ConstructionCatcalls


Quote:
Sinfest: Monique decides that she craves attention, and so wanders by a construction site (marked "High Testosterone Area"). This being Sinfest, it's she who makes the demeaning comments, then gleefully runs from the resulting barrage of construction equipment.


Find this strip.

Understand the issue.
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diagram12345



Joined: 08 Jul 2012
Posts: 154

PostPosted: Wed Feb 12, 2014 8:06 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Are those... cats?
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diagram12345



Joined: 08 Jul 2012
Posts: 154

PostPosted: Wed Feb 12, 2014 8:09 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Yinello wrote:
Cool, images from another universe. I've been dying to visit this world where women rule the world but it turns out I can't afford the drugs for it.


Well, it is true that on average men are far more likely to die on the job. Women have more desk/office jobs and men have more jobs where they take serious physical risks.

I don't really see how that's in any way relevant to sexual harassment though.
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